Happy New Year Suckas!

I'm fresh off of my holiday vacation and man I must say...

Damn, don't I have some more vacation time coming up?

Actually, I do, but I don't want to be a vacation whore so I'll free up some time for the other su....I mean other employees to take.

My Krimas (Christmas for the ghetto illiterate) was alright. I finally got a robe and slippers. No, people seriously I asked for the robe and slippers. It's colder than mutha in my apartment right after you get out of the shower, even with the heat on. Shit, a sista can finally feel all warm and fuzzy. I was able to get my Peanut pretty much everything she wanted for Christmas except for, hold your breath.

That damn Dora the Explorer doll!

Now check this, I got the talking dollhouse complete with the one sofa. Yes, a sofa! One measley sofa! It doesn't matter that you paid $50 for the damn house, you just gone get that one damn sofa. Oh, yeah you do get the mama, daddy, and Dora but damn one sofa? All them folks can't fit on that tiny ass sofa!

Okay, back to the story at hand.

Anyway, being the perfectionist that I am when it comes to my Peanut, I decided that she should have the dancing Dora doll that every store seemed to be out of stock of, although there were plenty of the dress up adventure Dora dolls. So, a couple of days before Christmas, I said fuck it (yeah, I said fuck it) and broke down and was going to get the dress up adventure doll, I wasn't going to like it, but I eventually realized that Peanut wasn't going to give a damn, it was me, the crazed mommy, that was concerned about which Dora doll she got to play with. Well, supply and demand pretty much beat me to the punch, because there were no more dolls left.

None
"El zippo!" as Dora would probably say

I thought I'd take my chances and ask the sales people at each of the stores that I went to if maybe, just maybe they had some in stock. So, I asked...

They looked at me as if they wanted laugh in my face and say "damn, are you dumb or what? Don't you know that EVERYBODY'S child wanted that doll and we don't have anymore you dumb hoe?"

Yeah, folks it felt just like that.

So anyway, Peanut went without Dora for Christmas, but she had the house and the smaller Dora doll and her mama and daddy and the one damn sofa. She got a whole lot of other stuff too people, but I was really hot about not getting her Dora doll. Luckily for me, she's a very forgiving child.

New Year's on the other hand sucked.

I was sick with a stomach virus, however, my entire family, wanted me to take a pregnancy test because they swore up and down that I was knocked up. My mama withheld Immodium AD from me y'all because of her suspicion. That's messed up man.

Anyway, time to get back to work....I'll holla.